Decade Shows And Painful Words And Smelly People And More!


I always loved those goofy I Love the 80’s type shows that used to be on VH1 all the time. Well, they’re playing this new one on the National Geographic Channel, The 90’s: The Last Great Decade. They also played one about the 80’s, which was rather entertaining. The idea of a virtual sea of people cheering and screaming in adoration for David frickin’ Hasselhoff (no idea how to spell that and, honestly, I really don’t care) just baffles me. The fact that he wore a leather jacket adorned with flashing, blinking, dancing lights just added that touch of class to the whole scene. I found the giant cell phones and the awesome graphics of the original Gameboy Tetris exceedingly amusing. I am currently watching the 90’s show and loving the whole trip down memory lane thing. Clinton playing his saxophone, Rosanne Barr and her show and Vanilla Ice–ah the memories. Now I can’t get Ice Ice Baby out of my head. Oh and there’s Arsenio Hall! I used to love his show! Hehehehe…some dude that was part of Tupac’s crew just said that Vanilla Ice was, “whacker than Hammer.” This show rocks!

There is a Geico commercial that ranks high on my list of ‘pointless, ridiculous yet delightfully awesome’ commercials. Like the one with the talking pothole and the one with Jake from State Farm and the Geico pig sitting by the pool singing, “boots and pants and boots and pants”. The one currently cracking me up is the one with the cowboy riding off and he smacks his head against the big ‘The End’ that appears. Makes me giggle every damn time.

So I was helping a customer at work tonight, and as soon as I got near her, it became PAINFULLY obvious that she either wasn’t wearing deodorant or that her deodorant was woefully inadequate. We are talking make-your-eyes-water-and-your-stomach-churn-and-your-head-do-that-weird-chicken-like-jerk-backwards thing. I had to keep finding reasons to move away from her. And the whole time, I am thinking, “What. The Hell. How does she not smell that horrific stench pouring from her armpits?” Then, later, I had this nasty icky dude come in, like, 20 minutes before we closed and want to return a couple things. He dumps several crumpled receipts on the counter, informing me he doesn’t know which one/ones are for the items. So not only did I have to stop doing the cigarette count, I had to flatten out all his dumb receipts, find the right one, and do the stupid return. As an added bonus, he was walking around with no shoes on, due to a raunchy-looking infection on one foot that he was kind enough to tell me all about the other day. At least he had a sock on the icky infected foot I guess. Nasty. Just a little tip for you–it is not the best idea ever to bring in a return in the last hour or so that a store is open. We have too much to do during that last hour to have any desire to do a return for your inconsiderate dumb ass. Just to give you a bit of an idea of how busy we are during the last hour of the day, here is the list of what we are expected to do at my store: sweep the store, mop the store/spot mop at least (which hardly ever happens as we run out of time), make sure all recovery/straightening is done and done correctly, assist customers, the cashier has to clean the register area and empty the 3 garbage cans and sweep the front area and the rugs, count cigarettes, add up cigarette count (which seems to take forever), make sure everything is put away (such as the day’s projects, returns, damages, items customers decide not to get at check out, items found in the wrong place throughout the store, etc), run the cigarette report, make sure the back room door is secured and the light is off, and make sure no customers remain in the store at closing time. May not sound like that much, but it is enough to drive a girl bat-shit crazy.

Daily randomosity: Aww, old school computers are so adorably clunky and awkward and such. It seems so weird that, when I was in high school in the 90’s, I knew absolutely nothing about the internet. The only computer game I had ever played was Oregon Trail, which was pretty much the bane of my existence. I always ended up killing most of us off long before we ever reached our destination. To this day, the thing only that ever ticked me off more than that little crap message announcing the death of one or more members of my group have died of cholera or some similarly delightful killer disease, is that damn dog that used to pop up to laugh at you in Duck Hunt. If I could ever go back in time, one of the first things I would do is hunt down and throttle the person who came up with the idea for reality television. I really need to clean my room. Which I should be able to do since I now have the next 3 days off work! And besides a tummy doctor appointment on Wednesday, I don’t have to go anywhere! Yay!



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