People suck. Yeah, I know, way to state the obvious, right? But here’s the thing, I kind of worry that maybe people don’t suck as bad as I think they do, and I’m pretty much just a heinously judgmental asshole. Seriously, I worry that I’m being totally unfair to the human race by thinking that the majority of them are, more or less, pieces of idiotic shit. I have, however, come to the conclusion that, while I probably really am a heinously judgmental asshole, my opinions are, in fact, pretty much spot on. People just suck. My proof of this? Besides the delightful bits of suckiness that we are lucky enough to be bombarded with in the media, just look around yourself. That shithead that talks to you like you’re a moron, the woman who almost runs you off the road because she is too busy texting to pay attention to her driving and then flips you off as though it’s all your fault, the jackass that opens shit at the store to get a better look but never purchases it, the piece of crap that still thinks racial slurs and tormenting others is the height of hilarity, the douche-bags that let their children run wild in stores without any attempt at corralling them or cleaning up after them–all sucky people. The bitch that tries on lipstick and puts it back on the shelf? Sucky person. They are everywhere! I think we should be allowed to throat punch these people just once…okay, maybe 2 or 3 times. Aw hell, who am I kidding? Throat punches for every one of those sucky scumbags. Especially the one who let their brat child trash the toy section tonight right after I straightened it and the one that tore open 6(!) packages of undies, pulled one or two pairs out of each package, then tossed the whole mess on the floor.
I go to my new lung doc tomorrow (today technically). I hope he’s decent and I really hope he can figure out something to make my stupid asthma quit being such an asshole. At least I know what to expect with the PFT’s (pulmonary function tests), seeing as how I’ve done them, like, a gazillion times.
Daily randomosity: Super excited to Skype with Chloe Tuesday! Damn it! I keep hitting the enter key with my pinky nail when I go to hit the shift key, and it is annoying the crap outta me! I think Cornelius Pumperdinkle is a good name for that M&M peanut–good choice yellow M&M dude! I really hate gnats. And flies. All bugs in general, really. Medieval Times was a pretty cool place, once you got past the whole–being served a complete Cornish Hen that still looks rather chicken-ish and there’s bones and skin and it just doesn’t seem right to eat something that still looks like a small chicken and actually kinda looks like a Bogart so then you name him and the meanies around you decide to pull his poor little hen leg off to discourage your compassion for poor Bogart who now only has one leg and looks even more pitiable and impossible to ingest–thing. I’m not sure I like the memes I made tonight. They just don’t seem that good to me. I could never be one of those folks who matches every aspect of their outfit perfectly. Like the lady on this show that’s wearing a red coat, red dress, red shoes, red earrings and has red fingernails and a red purse. It’s like a scary explosion of red in the shape of a person. Yikes.