You’ve Got Brain Barf On You

Standard

Tonight was, once again, completely awesomely craptastic.  Every time i have to tell spell check to add a word, I wonder just how bizarre my little dictionary is becoming.  So anyway, work was all work-ish and oh so delightful and such.  Once again, I am baffled by what people steal.  Tonight I discovered the remains of 2 packages of car air freshener things and my co-worker found an empty lunch meat container in the cooler.  Who the hell steals lunch meat?  And car air fresheners?  Seriously?  I don’t know why it still surprises me when people steal such oddly unnecessary things, but something always manages to make a new notch on my bizarre-o meter.

So I’ve been trying to get my room rearranged and tidied up and such to make room for my bed and stuff.  Yeah, it’s not going super awesome, which is beyond annoying.  When my aunt told me there is no way I will be able to fit anything besides my bed in here, my brain is all, “Challenge accepted.  Game on.”  (In a totally, ‘as if! I am totally a Tetris generation gal!  I got this shit.’ sort of voice of course.)  So now I just can’t admit defeat, regardless of the fact that my aunt doesn’t even actually know she issued this challenge.  I have no idea how I will make this work but, damn it, I will find a way somehow.

Randomosity:  I have come to the conclusion that I should maybe change the name of my blog to a nice, descriptive title.  Something along the lines of Brain Barf or Cranial Regurgitation or some such thing.  Since that’s pretty much what happens when I blog.  My brain just barfs out bizarre, random, snarky, hilarious, nonsensical crap all over this blog.  A man on t.v. just said, “You couldn’t just walk away.  You’d walk away in a body bag.”  I find so many things so very unacceptable about this statement.  First off, he is insinuating that you’d end up dead, which means you’re not walking anywhere, body bag or no body bag, unless of course you are a zombie and are eagerly joining in an epic apocalypse, in which case you would probably ditch said body bag if you were to find yourself inside it.  Second thing that is just wrong with this statement is that it is meant to be a seriously foreboding sort of thing.  But instead of feeling all ‘oh no!’, I find myself giggling as I immediately picture somebody trapped in a body bag, hopping around like some demented, yet pathetic, sack race contestant.  I wonder who took the time to figure out that the number of toilet paper tubes thrown away each year, just by Americans, would fill the Empire State Building twice, which this commercial says is the case.  I think this person may have a bit too much time on their hands.  Maybe they should get a pen pal.  Do pen pals really exist anymore?  ‘Cause I totally don’t think Facebook and Twitter and all that would actually count as such, since folks rarely have in depth, personal conversations on those sort of sites.  Maybe email pen pals exist, and that would be an acceptable alternative to actually utilizing good old snail mail.  I found a bunch of old cards and letters and such in my old suitcase last night.  Man, Caron  and I sure had a lot to say to each other–I found oodles of Caron notes and such.  I also found my small bundle of original, honest to goodness, old school Garbage Pail Kids cards!  I don’t think I’m going to be able to afford to take Dart to the vet until next week…not sure yet, I guess it depends what they need up front, and what I can do on some payment plan sort of deal.  I had a customer in tonight that amused me.  Kept calling me ‘love’ and telling me that he was so grateful for my help that he’d marry me or kiss me if he wouldn’t get in trouble and promised to add me to his Christmas gifts list, I just had to tell him what I wanted and he would come all the way back at Christmas time just to deliver it to me.  I was cracking up.

Peace out folks!

Advertisements

One thought on “You’ve Got Brain Barf On You

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s