Some Days Just Suck Ass. Luckily, I’m Weird Enough To Unearth Fun Shit From Even The Deepest Depths Of Suck Assery.

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I totally just made up that terminology–suck assery, and I must admit, i am disgustingly pleased with it’s awesomeness.  So anyway, today was supposed to be a good day.  Tom was going to drive all the way here and pick me up (since I am a carless bum and all) and I was supposed to go and chow down on the world’s most ah-mazingly yummy spinach dip and hang out with my Tom and Noodle and Rosie and Jason and Jess and Brian and maybe even get to play some Cards Against Humanity.  But noooooo, I ended up going into work.  I most definitely did NOT want to go to work today, not even a little.  But I am too nice for my own good and went to work.  I thought, “Well, at least I’ll have some extra hours on my check next week.”  Yeah, not so much.  In exchange for going into work, on my day off, on a damn holiday, I will actually end up LOSING hours.  It’s kind of hard to explain how that works, since I think it’s complete crap and all, but that’s the way it goes I guess.  On a happier note, i did work with Cat, and we spent a lot of time being rather ridiculously bizarre, so that was fun.

Randomosity:  My new fave word?  Vagetti!  Sounds dirty, doesn’t it?!?  I’m totally going to ask random people how their vagetti is feeling, or tell them not to get their vagetti in a twist or not to get all vagetti hurt or some such thing.  I just adore the whack-a-do, mostly made-up vocabulary.  The episode of  The Strain I’m watching just had a chick preparing to go out and face vampire creatures…by grabbing a plastic ice scraper on the way out the door.  An ice scraper!  For the love of all that is holy, what the hell was she going to do, scraper a vamp to death??  For cryin’ in the sink, those damn things don’t even work on ice, what the hell good would they be against a creepy disgruntled vamp?  I totally forgot to tell Carrie and my doofus brother and Jamie that i won’t have a phone until Friday.  Strangely, i don’t really actually mind not having it, seeing as I barely talk to or text anyone anyway.  There was one call I wanted to make, but it will have to wait until Friday.  So, am i the only one who finds the mere existence of fleas completely shudder-worthy?  Poor Dart’s been treated with the drop stuff and flea-collared and i sprayed the carpets, but I have seen 2 fleas and Dart’s still doing that occasional flea bite spaz fit.  I know it takes a week or two for it to clear up and all, but it’s driving me bat-shit.  Bugs just need to stay away from me, damn it.  Like yesterday, while I was taking a quick smoke break, one of those damn hard-shelled little black bugs bit me.  And I was all, “No you didn’t, you little son of a bitch!” and the bug was all, “whatever wussy girl, take that!”  So I had to squash the little bastard, and then do the icky bug dance to get it’s stupid little bug carcass and viscera and such off my arm.  And now i have this big ol’ stupid welt thingy where he bit me, and now I totally want to hunt down his little bug family and destroy them all.  I want one of the My Fun Fish tank thingies!  Of course, if I got one of those, I’d need a fish to go with it (I had a complete mouse/cookie moment there!), which might not be the best idea ever, since I seem to have some sort of fish curse or something.  Tchaikovsky died, both Drop Dead Freds died (apparently this is a very unfortunate name to give any fish you happen to win at a fair, since they obviously feel some sort of pressure to live up to this name and keel over mere hours after you get them home…or maybe I have deep seated fish hatred or something), and i even managed to inadvertently slaughter my entire sea monkey population in one fell swoop.  Wow, I’d forgotten how down-right bizarre this Evil Dead 2 movie is.  Just wow.

Laters gators!

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