Bad Blogger-No Cookie, Butts Of The Petting Zoo, That Time When Being Fat Was Life-Saving, And Mounds Of Miscellaneous Crap

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Okay, so I might be the worst blogger ever, since I haven’t blogged in ages and all.  I could use the excuse that I was on vacation, visiting the family and all, for an entire week.  I could also whine about having to deal with some seriously stressful and emotionally exhausting family shit.  I could even throw in a little pity party about having to work almost every day since I got back.  But really, it’s easier to just sum it up with this:  Shit’s been a mix of awesome and utterly shitty for a while, and I just didn’t have it in me to blog.  I apologize profusely to my loyal readers, and promise I will try to do better…or at least suck less at posting more frequently and such.  On a positive note, I have tons of crap to tell y’all, so here goes!

So I got to go visit the fam for 7 whole days!  It was mostly beyond awesome, with a bit of hellacious shittiness thrown in here and there.  But, as always, it was so amazing to spend so much time with my adorable Chloe.  We did all sorts of nifty stuff!  We went to 2 movies (the minion one and that inside out Disney movie), which were both really cute and funny and all that.  And we went to the pool and the library (I totally have a reader crush on their library!) and the aquarium and on a couple train rides and we saw a 4D movie and we went to Gigi’s Playhouse and a petting zoo.  It was all very fun and rather nifty and all that.  I must say though, those petting zoo critters can be downright snobbish!  It started to feel like all we saw was the animal’s butts as they blatantly snubbed us, turning their backs and trying to ignore our presence entirely.

DSCN3156 DSCN3167

DSCN3154DSCN3161butt of duck...petting zoo...7.8.15

hehehe...Carrie is totally playing the Vanna thin quite well..."and heeeeeere's another butt" lol

hehehe…Carrie is totally playing the Vanna thin quite well…”and heeeeeere’s another butt” lol

On my way to Illinois, I was barely a mile from my house when I spotted a bald eagle, which was pretty awesome since I’ve never seen one so close-up before.  Anyway, I’m oh-ing and ah-ing over the eagle and I realize that it appears to be struggling.  It kept struggling to take off, only to pretty much crash back down.  Just as I was starting to get really worried that it was hurt or something, I realize what’s happening.  I watch the eagle try one more time to get air-born, when it’s obvious it just isn’t going to happen, it finally lets go of what it had kept stubbornly clutched in its talons.  I started laughing when I saw the fat little furry critter tumble from the eagles clutches and land rather unceremoniously on the ground.  After a second of stunned stillness, the chubby fuzzball took off into the field.  Can you imagine what went through that little critter’s mind when he realized he was on solid ground again?  “Imdeadimdeadimdeadim…not dead.  Holy shit…I’m alive…ohmygawd I’m alive…hahaha!  take that you rotten eagle bastard!  the guys are never gonna believe this shit…”

And now for some pics of my trip that do not involve animal butts!

how frickin' adorable is this kid?!?!?!?

i love this little girl with all my heart and she adores her auntie.  and how could anyone not love her?  i mean, how frickin’ adorable is this kid?!?!?!?

so glamorous!

so glamorous!

those are her new noise-reducing headphones--which she LOVES!  they made it so she could enjoy the movies and the train rides and even the loud hand dryers in bathrooms, which became exciting rather than terrifying. (she has a lot of noise anxiety)

those are her new noise-reducing headphones–which she LOVES! they made it so she could enjoy the movies and the train rides and even the loud hand dryers in bathrooms, which became exciting rather than terrifying. (she has a lot of noise anxiety)

again with the gang sign thing...such an oddball! lol

elise and chloe…adorable sister moment…except…again with the gang sign thing…such an oddball! lol

alex and elise...such a cute couple!

alex and elise…such a cute couple!

my nieces are oh so graceful and composed and such!

my nieces are oh so graceful and composed and such!

Randomosity:  I finally have a phone that actually works!  Like, I push the button to call someone–and it does!  And I can type a text message!  And even send it!  Granted, getting this nifty new phone took several hours of frustration and irritation yesterday, but it’s all good.  It’s incomprehensibly difficult to love someone who makes you want to throttle them pretty much constantly.  cauliflower is good stuff.  I totally got hit on by a fella who’s probably way too young for me, though he was a cutie and all.  It was rather interesting.  The torture chamber Geico commercial is fracking hilarious.  Gigi’s playhouse is pretty awesome–it will be a great resource for Chloe!  I should probably wrap this up for today, save some stories for another day.  Besides, I gotta take Pierre back to Tom.

I’m outta here, deer!

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